No Whine Left Behind
"No Whine Left Behind" is the podcast that serves up a blend of real talk while sipping cocktails. Join your hosts Celia and Alex as we dive into life’s ups and downs, share wild stories we’ve read, and chat about the everyday family drama we all know too well.
No Whine Left Behind
S3 E1 Bougie on a Budget
Ever slathered on SPF 50 just to end up looking like a lobster anyway? Same. On this episode of 'No Wine Left Behind,' we're cracking up over post-family weekend hangovers and sunburn fails. We’re dishing out the lowdown on sunscreens that work, plus some killer beauty buys from Trader Joe's that won't make your wallet cry.
But wait, there's more! We’re breaking down the drama of 'The Golden Bachelor' (because old guys are HOT), hyping up the 2028 Olympics in LA, and, of course, talking about the legendary duo Snoop & Martha. Oh, & did we mention the TikTok food trends that make us say, 'WTF?' Trust us, you don't want to miss our kitchen safety horror stories—like exploding hard-boiled eggs in the microwave. Tune in for laughs, life hacks, & a whole lot of chaos!
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Welcome to the no Wine Left Behind podcast, where we truly leave no wine behind. I'm Alex and I'm Celia. We are here in the studio together, sharing ups and downs, frustrations and funny moments of our daily adventures. So grab your favorite glass, join us as we raise our voices Together, we'll dive into the drama of life as we see it. Hello, what's happening? It's me, okay, I see you. I sing at the top of every episode. You do, I try, okay, yeah, sometimes it doesn't really work out very well, but that's okay. What's going on? Nothing, you know this. And that life, regular life, is life.
Speaker 1:And just came off of a big family weekend. That was incredible. That was so much fun. Yes, too much fun for some of us. Yes, yes, definitely too much fun for some of us, but it was good time. We've all been there.
Speaker 1:It's so funny now being like the elder cousin and seeing like the younger people be hungover and like drink too much, like do their thing and think back, like that was me one day. Yeah, and I've grown wiser kind of not really. I still have hangovers. I still indulge a little too much, yeah, but not as much as some others did this weekend, but some of them don't do it often. So when they do it, they go hard, like really hard, yeah, and they definitely deserve to like they all work so hard, right? Well, most of them are parents and they just they all have just so much going on. So, yeah, very well deserved. It was a nice like go with the flow. I was a little concerned with you know, keeping certain people happy and, you know, making sure that they were okay with you know what we were doing, um, but then it just kind of all kind of went where it went and we all just did our thing and it was nice. There's a lot of us, we're a big family with big personalities.
Speaker 1:You did an incredible job covering your sunburn. I have to tell you, holy smokes, okay, you look fantastic. You don't even look like you had a sunburn. I was under an umbrella most of the time, not all of the time, didn't? At one point, you had like a towel over your head. At one point I felt myself getting warm, like really warm, and I thought, oh, no, like I know what's going to happen, I'm going to get a sunburn. I wrapped myself in a towel like this and I'm under the umbrella in a chair like this, and you still got sunburned. I got a sunburn, do you know? All I wore was a baseball cap and I was in the sun the entire time. Nothing on my face.
Speaker 1:I got more burnt in the two hours we were at the lake than the five days. We're on a fucking cruise. Yeah, I'm not surprised like I am. I'm not surprised what? Yeah, because because on the cruise we're in and out, in and out, in and out.
Speaker 1:We weren't in the sun for too long of a time and then we sat in the shade a lot, yeah, but like at the lake, at the I'm the river, excuse me, it's just sun. There's no shade anywhere. Yeah, there was no shade, but I did wear um sunscreen and then I put my baseball cap on and I nothing Like my chest got burned, my shoulders, but I was so glad. Yeah, because the one thing I hate about a face sunburn is like exfoliating, yes, like your skin peeling. Yeah, it's just nasty, it's going to happen. Yeah, so shoulders, you cover them up, throw a t-shirt on whatever but face, and it's bad for your skin. Okay, all right, you're rubbing it in, we get it, we get it. Just wear moisturizer with sunscreen in it.
Speaker 1:I do. Apparently. It's not good enough. You need to get super goop. That's the best. Oh yeah, I don't. I don't use super goop.
Speaker 1:It's pricey, but it's god, yeah, yeah, yeah, next summer there might be a dupe. There's a dupe for everything. Now, there's always a dupe. I bet you and I'm going to find it for you there's a super dupe. Oh, I just said that. Yes, try to say that fast five times, not happening, yeah, speaking of dupes, our niece Sabrina, oh my gosh, yes, oh my God. Well, your cousin, my niece, um, found so I love, sold DeGennaro, right, so good.
Speaker 1:62 is my favorite. Um, the bum bum, bum, bum bum, whatever. Some people call it bum bum, some people call it bum bum, I call it bum bum. Anywho, it's like $50 or something at Sephora, right? She found the dupe at Trader Joe's for $6. It's so good, I am all over it. Yes, so she had two of them, yes, and I forget what the other one was. The other one was equivalent to the green one, which I'm not sure what number it is, but yeah, but one of them for sure. Legitimate dupe, brazilian Crush is my favorite. That number 62 is so good, oh, so good.
Speaker 1:But Trader Joe's, you know what they got some good shit. Like I go there and I buy food, I never, ever, ever look at their household products, their cleaning cleaning products, their face products. Never look at any of that stuff, yeah, ever. So I decided to go there and went right to that aisle and bought myself some moisturizer. Yeah, it is so good, I'm so excited. So the one closest to us has a very small section of that. The one closer to Courtney way better. Okay, all right, I'm going to have to check that out on my way, 100%. Or, if she's ever on her way down, have her make a pit stop and bring stuff to you, because they have a much bigger selection. Yeah, awesome, adriana's friend um brought her like.
Speaker 1:So Adriana slept over a friend's house a couple weeks ago and she like used some of her face products. Yeah, and Adriana was like, oh my god, this is so nice, I love this. Whatever. The next day that evening we were out, her friend came and dropped off every single face product that Adriana had used from her it was and bought it for her. She left it all on her vanity. She's like you need to use this this time, this, this, this. These two are at night. This is for after that, like she left her specific instructions on how to use it all and bought her this, oh, like I think she came on like six different things, so it's so sweet, and then she texted her oh, I left you a little surprise. Oh my god.
Speaker 1:So that was the sweetest thing and it was all Trader Joe's um stuff. I love it. But like I was comparing it to like Sephora stuff, yeah, and um, like CVS brand stuff same stuff, because I'm looking at ingredients, I'm looking at oh yeah. But even better for you, because that's Trader Joe's whole stance, is that one, it's more affordable, but two, it's all like very organic or locally sourced. They're very like on point about their products. Yes, so I was very excited about that. That's so sweet and I am going to start buying more Trader Joe's early products products about to be in our trader girl, trader joe girl era. Yeah, I was happy about that.
Speaker 1:So they had this. They had this vitamin c firming moisturizer, bought one of those because I need to get firm. I mean, didn't you just buy a bunch of stuff in Miami? I did. I'm still trying to get firm. I did. I'm all out of the liquid Botox. I gotta order some more.
Speaker 1:Oh my gosh, that's funny. I mean, that's good that you used it all and it worked. Oh, I don't know if it's worked and I still feel like I look the same. But because you look great so you can improve perfection, oh, stop it. Anywho, what you got for me, anything good? Um, I have something that I want to talk about, but I don't think you want to talk about it. Oh my God, is this the bachelor thing, the golden bachelorette? Oh, but hear me out, okay. Okay, I'm not for the whole like plot of the show. I think it's silly, neither here nor there.
Speaker 1:The men that are participating for this bachelorette, that are participating For this bachelorette, ma'am, they are 60 plus, they are handsome, some of them retired, some of them still working. Listen, I'm single and if people ask me oh, like what are you looking for? Someone in their 60s? Because these guys are it. I know nothing about the actual Bachelorette, but her contenders, these bachelors, I'll watch for them. Oh my God, do you know what happened to the last Golden Bachelor? They divorced in like a week, perfect. So I don't know how many there are. Right, there's like 20, 30 contenders. So by the end of the series, there's going to be 20, 30 contenders. I the end of the series. There's gonna be 20 30 contenders. I'm, I'm going on a road trip here's, here's my thing.
Speaker 1:These, these people so say let's talk about the golden bachelor. Yeah, okay, gary, that was his name. His name was gary, this handsome fella. He had all these women trying to, you know, seduce him and get his attention, and all this stuff. He finally landed on one. Yeah, this woman from New Jersey. He's from Colorado. They're on the show for I don't know what, six, eight, 10 weeks or something.
Speaker 1:Right, as they go through all these different people, not once did they talk about where they were from and how they were going to make it work if they decided to be together. Because, guess what? Their relationship supposedly ended because they lived in opposite parts of the country and they just didn't know how to bring their families together. Silly um hello. You never talked about that the whole time you were on the show. It's probably like a marketing ploy. It probably wasn't, and that's why I don't on the show. It's probably like a marketing ploy. It probably wasn't for no reason, and that's why I don't like the show and I'll never watch it, because none of those Bachelor people have stayed married. One of them ended up being gay, which is great.
Speaker 1:I love him. He's awesome. He's so funny and cute and handsome. Well, maybe she helped him on his journey, but here's the thing he went through all those women which one's bill the top one. No, he's not. Bill's hot. Okay, hold on hold on, hold on hold on.
Speaker 1:Look at, uh, oh, look at, christopher 64, where, oh, yeah, he's cute, uh-huh, let's see. But they're not all hot. So there's another gary. I don't find him very attractive, but he's 65. No, fucking way, no, he is not. None of them are to be honest with you. Yes, yes, see, I wouldn't be a good golden bachelor.
Speaker 1:There's a guy on there from Peabody. I couldn't find the right one, let's see. Oh, ma'am, jonathan. Hello, yeah, he's cute, he's all right, he's bald, though. Right, I'm going to Oakland, iowa. I sure the fuck am.
Speaker 1:I don't know about the baldness, not, not down with the baldness. Listen, there's got to be someone here for you. Look at, look at pascal, what? No, 69, 70, no, maybe, maybe, maybe, maybe. Even thomas. He looks like fun. I don't know. You know, thomas is in new york, he's close driving distance. There you go.
Speaker 1:We'd be able to make it work. He was a firefighter, I'd move to New York. He was a cheap firefighter. See, I could make it work with him. I'd move to New York in a heartbeat. But I'm not going to go through 20 episodes of Bachelor and then marry you and go. Oh, never mind, I don't know how you're going to move to mine. Ridiculous, I just sent it to you so we can.
Speaker 1:Okay, I'm not watching that. You know what I like? To get the highlights. Just give me the highlights. We need to know when it ends. So then we know which guys are still single. We're going to go find one for me. Okay, I'm trying to tell you, stop being so selfish. Okay, I might need to new one too someday. You never know. Oh, my goodness gracious, killed. Anyways, I love you, babe.
Speaker 1:Anywho, um, can we talk about the olympics? Even though you don't really like the olympics, are they still going? You talked about your golden bachelor, that I'm talking about the Olympics, which is something that people actually care about. It's over, oh, closing ceremony, because the USA won 126 medals. They were number one. That's great. Yeah, that's awesome, I know, okay, good, and we're going to be in LA in 2028. Oh God, I would love to go there and see the Olympics. Let's do it, let's plan it.
Speaker 1:Do you know there's going to be a new sport in 2028? Because they don't fucking have enough. What the heck? If you were an Olympic watcher which you're not, yeah, would you prefer squash uh-huh, to watch squash, lacrosse, uh-huh. Flag football, okay. Cricket. Or baseball and softball? Oh, that's hard, it's not. I'm surprised. Baseball's not on there already. Exactly, football, basketball's on there, right, so why not baseball? Yeah, but I feel like squash, cricket, that would be interesting to see. I mean, it's big in other countries, very popular, so I'm surprised that's not on there. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, but you know what's not going to be on there in 2028?
Speaker 1:What break dancing? Break dancing did not make the cut. Weird, some of them were not. Unfortunately, break dancing was a one and done. How do they determine? Like, like, is it viewership? Like I don't, like, have no idea.
Speaker 1:The article said nothing. It just said lack of participation. Because why is breakdancing an olympic sport? Yeah, I don't know, that's crazy. Well, it's not anymore. No, no, so there's that wait. So do we know what the new one is going to be, is it? No, they haven't decided yet. Oh, so it's going to be one of those.
Speaker 1:That's a lot of them that I'd like to say lacrosse or baseball, softball, but yeah, well, I feel like if they do baseball, they'd have to do softball. I mean, I wouldn't, because you have to have like a female and a male version of the same sport. I feel like, right, I wouldn't watch any of those events because I'm not interested in any of them. But it would be better than breakdancing. Sure, yeah, whatever.
Speaker 1:As long as my tiptoe fucking horses are still in there, I'm good to go. Oh, the dressage? Yeah, sure, whatever, I call them tiptoes, they're so they like amazing, of course. Okay, anything else, it makes me want to ride a horse. There's a place right down on up the road. Yeah, I want to go.
Speaker 1:Go, it's there. It's open to the public. You can ride a horse whenever you want. Thank you for being so supportive. Yeah, ride a horse, save a cowboy. Is that the song? Save a horse, ride a cowboy? Oh, no, not sure. Which way does it go? You could ask me. I guess it could go either way. I'm not sure. Depends on who you want to save. Yeah, yeah, I'd rather save the horse anyways.
Speaker 1:Hey, some of these, uh, golden bachelor contestants or bachelorette contestants? The cowboys, they're ranchers. Oh, I'd love me a good rancher. Oh, yeah, baby, remember Yellowstone? Yeah, kevin Costner, hello, yes, find me him and I'm sold.
Speaker 1:Or who was his son, the handsome son, not the district attorney son, oh, the other one, oh, the other one. I can't remember his name. Oh, my God, yes, it was right there. And then, like Beth's husband, what was his name? Trip? No, I don't know, but he was handsome. I'm down. Get me some of them. God, I can't remember their names, but, yeah, and I love you.
Speaker 1:Know, when they take people down to the where do they take them? To the train, down to the train station. I'd like to take a few people down to the train station. I got a list. Let's get away from that. Let's move on. Snoop Dogg yes, let's move on.
Speaker 1:Um soup dog yes, he was like, he was incredible. The liaison, yes, of the fucking olympics. You know that he was getting paid five hundred thousand dollars a day. What, yes, he was. I think his, his.
Speaker 1:So he was like very popular rapper way back when right 90s, right late 80s, early 90s. Then he's like fizzled out. He was doing a lot of collabs with different, you know, rappers, singers, whatever. Then he collabed with martha stewart, like for. So he like kind of, was like a lull. You didn't hear about snoop dogg, he was just like nowhere. Yep, then all of a sudden, him and martha stewart, it's like an unget together and it's boom. Yeah, he just it blew up again. Yep, he tapped into a market that I'm sure neither one of them expected.
Speaker 1:Oh no, because her too. He helped her. Oh yeah, she went to jail, yes, and in her market she would have been blackballed. Oh yeah, like she would have slowly just dwindled away in the dark and nobody would have remembered her. Right, like Paula Deen, gone, gone, right.
Speaker 1:But whoever is behind them, managing them, they knew what they were doing. Oh yeah. Or maybe they didn't and it just happened to work out the way that it is. They're a power couple right there. They're strong. Together years, their relationship has flourished and has opened a lot of doors for the both of them.
Speaker 1:I love it. I think it's they're the funniest, like duo, yeah. They're like the unlucky, like the odd couple. Oh yeah, yeah, perfect, it's great, it's perfect and it's what everyone needs, because they're wholesome and they're fun and they're not like weird, but also they're relatable. Because of his background, because of her being a felon. It's not relatable. Yeah, yeah, no, I love it. I think it's awesome. It's great, great, great, great. Everything's awesome. So what you got Speaking of Martha Stewart, something that really bothers me when I'm on TikTok lately are these fucking trends of like walking tacos, what?
Speaker 1:And lazy strawberry shortcakes. So it's like people making meals in fucking Dorito and Frito bags. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, I've seen that. Yeah, that's stupid, it's gross. Yeah, and grow up, yeah, like learn how to cook and eat off a fucking plate. Or people using the Doritos in their food. And grow up, yeah, like learn how to cook and eat off a fucking plate. Or people using the Doritos in their food. Like they'll make this whole thing and then they'll crunch up a bag of Doritos and like throw it in there. All right, hold on.
Speaker 1:No, I like to put potato chips on my tuna sandwich. Oh, you're one of those people. Oh, so that's a little different, that's a little classy. I don't want a. I don't want a crunch of a potato chip in every bite of my sandwich. I don't even eat sandwiches that often Put like a little sprinkle. No, no, no, I put them on the side and I'll take a bite of my sandwich, then I'll take a chip and I'll take another bite of my sandwich. Maybe I'll take a bite of my sandwich, maybe I'll take a chip. I have the option. I don't want to have the op, I don't want to have, not have the option. It's just like crunch, crunch, crunch every single bite. Okay, I want the crunch. I'll throw a pickle on my sandwich. That'll give me a crunch.
Speaker 1:Why do we put pickles on fucking sandwiches? Why don't we keep that on the side, like the chips? No, it's. Don't put pickles on my shit. No, pick the pickle juice. G flavor gives it that extra kick. No, no, don't do that. No, yeah, no, don't. Don't put my pickles on. Don't put pickles on my shit. Okay, well, you can have your pickle on the side and I will have my chips on the side.
Speaker 1:And then everyone needs to stop putting their food in fucking bags. Yeah, aluminum bag, there's always a trend. And then they're wondering why we're dying of all these things. No, because what is that fucking bag made out of? And then your hot food is cooking those chemicals. Well, and then you're digesting it.
Speaker 1:How about the people who cook ramen in the styrofoam cup In the microwave? Hello, there's a reason why styrofoam was banned. Styrofo, it doesn't go in the microwave, right, but they continue to do it. Yeah, and it's not people, it's dumb teenagers, of course. So I tell my kids, yeah, dump it in a bowl, a glass bowl, and put it in the microwave. Do you think they do that? No, no, they just keep cooking that cooking and ingesting those chemicals from the styrofoam in that microwave.
Speaker 1:Speaking of teenagers eating things or cooking, my teenager wanted a hard-boiled egg, so I made some. I make some like here and there, and then we just like eat them as we go, like sometimes for breakfast, like whatever. She decided to put it in the microwave. Oh, no See, you know and I, I know, probably some people listening knows what happens when you put a already cooked, hard-boiled egg into the microwave. It's two, two of them. Crime scene, fucking exploded, crime scene. Yeah, you should just pick up the microwave and throw it in the trash. Oh, it's forget it. She just she opened it, she looked at it, she closed it, she walked.
Speaker 1:How about the time? Oh, that reminds me the time that you're I know this is probably not the same daughter, it might be. No, it's not the same one put milk in the keurig? Oh, yeah, because she wanted to make hot chocolate. Yeah, yeah, that was good and nobody knew. Uh-huh, this was on like a friday or saturday, and then when you went to go make coffee, to make coffee, I almost died that day. Yeah, that must have been a good time. Yeah, those are. I bet that went in the trash. Oh, one thousand percent. One in the trash? Oh, yeah, one thousand percent, that was. That wasn't gonna be cleaned.
Speaker 1:So do you want to do a little? Uh, yes, let's do a this or that before we leave this or that, let's do it. Okay, it's actually. Would you rather? Oh, oh, yeah, even better. So would you rather find true love today or win the lottery next year? Win the fucking lottery this year, next year, every fucking year?
Speaker 1:Hell, fucking, yeah, got you lose your sight or your memory? Oh, oh, lose my sight or lose my memory. I'd almost want to lose my sight. Really, I feel like in our family people would fuck with me if I lost my memory. Oh, they, they totally. Yeah, that made me nervous. Just thinking about it makes me really nervous. I, if I lost my memory, they totally would. Yeah, that made me nervous. Just thinking about it makes me really nervous. I would rather lose my memory. Take my eyes, take my memory, because I want to see what the fuck is going on around me.
Speaker 1:Okay, have a pause button or a rewind button. Rewind, so I can fucking prove motherfuckers right. When people are like, I never said that I can be like. Oh, that's right. Yeah, I like that. Who needs a pause button? Pause for what? How about this one? Oh god, sip gin with ryan reynolds, but take a shot with the rock duane johnson. Oh, I'm taking a shot with tequila. Fucking hate ryan reynolds. You do unpopular opinion, so I like him, but I would rather take a. Take a tequila shot with the duane. Oh, 100, yeah, doing johnson. Yeah, okay, he married a woman from massachusetts, so the rock will always have my fucking heart. Yes, I love him, always love him.
Speaker 1:Um, hunt and butcher or never eat meat again. I will never eat meat. Same, not me hunting. Hey, if you really love me, you gotta hunt for it and you gotta carve that shit up. That is the most. I have no choice but to not eat meat, okay, same, I, I don't care, I would never. Angelina Jolie's lips or Jennifer Aniston's hair oh, jennifer Aniston's hair has been iconic for decades. We're going with Jen, definitely. Okay, me too. Same. Give up cursing. Or ice cream for one year. Ice cream, totally.
Speaker 1:There's no way I'm not going to say fuck this, fuck you, fuckity, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck them kids. Yeah, like never. Shitty, shit, shit, yeah, okay, okay, hear a comfortable lie or an uncomfortable truth? Ignorance is bliss. Man. Lie to me every day. No, I want to hear an uncomfortable truth. Fuck that I like the truth. The truth will set you free. I mean, that's for the person who's lying. But you can lie to me, don't lie to yourself. You see what I'm saying? Like, the truth sets you free, but it still hurts me. So keep lying to me. Okay, I want the truth, okay, okay, okay. So there's that. Thank you for joining us on this wine filled adventure. We would greatly appreciate your support. Please follow and rate our podcast on apple podcast, spotify or wherever you're tuning in right now. So raise a glass, leave no wine behind and let's continue this journey together. Cheers.
